Remembering Loved Ones

November really is the month dedicated to the dead.

As many of you know, Halloween and Samhain was recently. Is it just me or was there a lot of energy that day? Something moved me and made me feel compelled to set up a shrine to my ancestors. This is something I have been wanting to do for a little while now but there was something about the night of Samhain that just felt right.

Personally, I do not celebrate the holiday because I do not follow the Wheel of the Year. I spend my Halloweens passing out candy to all the children though. That is always fun. The Romans did however have a day for the dead and ancestors just shortly after October 31st. On November the 8th, the lid to the mundus was opened which signified an opening to the underworld being opened. On this day, spirits form the underworld were able to freely travel about the living. There was a superstition involving spitting out beans to keep the spirits from attacking living family members.

With so many holidays around this time involving ancestors and spirits of the once living,  there has to be something special about this time of the year. It is no wonder that I was practically compelled to finally set up my ancestor shrine now.

I am glad I have this little space set up too. My mother's passing was a huge and emotional moment in my life. It affected my college to the point were I was depressed and my studies suffered. The story of my mother and my relationship with her is a long one involving her being addicted to drugs and a lot of emotions from both sides of things. I won't get in to that now though.

Setting up an ancestor shrine or altar can be a great way to not only remember a loved one but to also help with dealing with a passing.

After my mother passed, everyone stopped talking about her. I was expected to just move on. I felt like I could not say anything to anyone and I would never recommend anyone keeping these feelings to themselves. Even if you can't talk to family, find someone to share these feelings with because losing someone can be so difficult. Having a small space to remember that person has been a great help for me. Her photo is there so in a way, she is still there in memory. My mother cannot be there in person, but her image is there and visible for me and everyone to see. I can also talk to her through my shrine. I have no way of knowing if she can hear me or not, but it gives me some comfort even if I am just talking to myself.

Ancestor altars are also sometimes used in a religious and magical context. It is possible, in some religions, to work with the ancestors. The ways one can work with ancestors varies from them helping you with protection to life guidance and everything in between.

My ancestor shrine remains just a place for me to remember family members who have moved on though. I have only had the shrine up for a few days but already I am feeling better about things.